Messy conversations
God doesn't need sterile conversation
Be honest.
You’ve prayed exactly like this, yeah?
Let me tell you about the time I felt called to ministry…
…I was an angsty teenager who felt like life was terrible when it really wasn’t. I was at a Sr. High Retreat. Most of my friends were 8th graders, still in the Middle School group in my youth group.
So, when my youth pastor (who, fun fact, is now my mentor nearly 16 years later) suggested we all go off to do quiet times, I ended up praying like this guy screaming into a phone.
And once I got all of my resentment and rage out, a thought popped into my head.
Have you ever thought about being a youth pastor?
And, welp, the rest is history.
But it wasn’t until I was 100% raw, empty, and honest in my prayer that I got to a point where I was ready to listen to God’s response.
And I don’t think I have gotten another response like that from God since that day back in 2007. Not in that almost audible sort of way, at least.
And…can I be honest?
I may have used some swear words in my head while praying. And I truly believe God did not care at all.
Because it was my most genuine and authentic prayer I had ever prayed at that point in my life.
God can handle everything you’ve got. God’s gotten worse, God has experienced worse. If we believe what scripture teaches us, then God, in Jesus, has lived and experienced the worst of the worst of the worst that humanity has to offer and took it all on so we can know God loves us more than any terrible thing that can happen to us.
I’ll stop there before I start preaching.
So, yeah. God doesn’t need sterilized conversations and prayers.
God wants you, your authentic and genuine self, when you move towards God in prayer.
My prayer for today
Our Father, thank you for angsty teenagers and what we can learn from them. Thank you for the work of grace you were doing in my life far before I recognized what was happening. May it be your will for each of us to pray like a teenager, a child, a parent at the end of their rope, a broken-hearted spouse…and may your will be done. Amen.
Remember
If you need to have a shouting match with God, that’s okay. If you need to sob into your pillow and let those emotions become your prayer, then so be it. If you need to curse and scream, then God can handle it. Be your genuine, authentic self with God, even if you can’t be that with everyone else. And listen for God’s response.